Don’t you forget about me
Don’t you forget about me
Why it’s worth reuniting with the cast from your edition of High School Musical
Not long ago, my husband and I ran into our sophomore-year English teacher at the camera shop. Bumping into Mr. Probert on a random Saturday afternoon was an unexpected treat. You don’t get many chances to reconnect with your teachers, especially the ones you’d grade on the right side of your bell curve. Mr. Probert’s sense of humor always made him seem more like the entertaining host of a late-night show instead of the teacher charged with building our vocabulary, literary analysis, and essay writing skills for the SATs and college applications looming on the horizon.
Chatting with Mr. Probert was like stepping into a time machine. Listening to him reminisce about our class transported me back to a time I don’t often revisit, even though I have mostly good memories of high school. It was like stumbling upon an episode of “This Is Your Life” from the season when my classmates and I were still figuring out how life worked, but we were getting better, and the sky was the limit. We had the luxury of not dealing with any of the travails of adulting because we had teachers, parents, and other adults looking out for us. It wasn’t all rainbows and butterflies, but all in all, we had it pretty good.
Listening to Mr. Probert talk, you could tell that he took his job of helping students mature and succeed at whatever path they wanted to pursue seriously. But it was also clear that he had delighted in us. We may not have consciously realized it back then, but it was what probably allowed him to connect with us.
That’s the cool thing about talking with your teachers once you’re a grown-up. You get to have conversations with them that you couldn’t have had while you were a student. You get to revisit episodes that were part of your own coming-of-age story and get the perspective of a character who was there to see the whole thing happen. It allows you to see a more complete picture of scenes from your life story.
I couldn’t resist pulling out my sophomore yearbook when we got home. As I thumbed through the faculty section, I saw–though I didn’t remember doing this–that I had asked each of my teachers from that year to sign my yearbook. And each one had written a few lines. I suppose we mattered more to each other than I remembered.
It reminded me how lucky I was to have been in the care of teachers committed to preparing us for the world while making our everyday high school life as good as it could be.
Once I opened my yearbook, I couldn’t resist a further journey down memory lane. I read some of the notes my classmates had written when they signed my yearbook. I wasn’t entirely surprised that I had forgotten some of the incidents my classmates had encouraged me never to forget (and truthfully, some still didn’t ring a bell even after I’d read about them). But it was interesting to remember what life as a 15-year-old was like.
I was surprised to come across notes from classmates I hadn’t thought about in a while. I suppose because your friend group evolves from sophomore to senior year, sometimes the people who were part of your early high school career aren’t as prominent in your takeaway memories. But in any case, reading those notes reminded me I was lucky to have had those people in my life–even if we only played a bit part in each other’s lives for a while.
I know high school reunions are less common these days. With social media, a mass gathering every five years is less necessary than it used to be for keeping up with your classmates. But if a high school reunion rolls around, I encourage you to go. There’s a big difference between reading what somebody posts on Instagram and interacting with them in person.
And take advantage of other opportunities to stay in touch with your old school. Go to the homecoming game. Go to the spring musical. When you get an invitation for an alumni happy hour that will include some of your old teachers, go.
I know it isn’t always easy to return to your high school when you’re in your 20s. Maybe you feel like you have to prove to yourself that you’ve moved on and you don’t need those people anymore. Or that glass-half-empty voice in your head may say you will only run into people you don’t want to see.
But I would wager that you will enjoy connecting in person with the people who starred in your personal edition of High School Musical more than you expect to.
Just because something is in your past doesn’t mean that it deserves only to be in your rearview mirror. There’s something special about staying in touch with the people who knew you when you were an earlier version of yourself.
Who knows–maybe if you’re really lucky, one of those teachers who helped make your high school years great will turn up, and you can make each other’s day.
In the olden days, moms used to clip newspaper articles for their kids if they thought it was something they needed to know. I’m watching for things you might have missed that may be helpful to you.
This week’s clips:
How do you make the most of your high school reunion? Some tips on how to survive.
Should you rent or buy a house? The New York Times just updated its financial calculator to reflect current tax law. Use this handy tool to run multiple scenarios.
Should you or shouldn’t you lend money to a friend or relative? Read or listen to Life Kit’s “Do and Don’ts of Lending Money.”